Bhakti: performance and the perturbation...

With my elder son unwell since Satruday, and me and family as always trying to avoid medication, the evening and the next morning ( of the Bhakti Poets show) was spent in accupressure, natural home-remedies , and homeopathy. Son got better, and the mind shifted back to thoughts about the upcoming show. I was getting anxious about not having had time to go over my script and rehearse for the show. How ironic ! A few hours later, I was going to sing and share stories about not being anxious, about doing our best and having faith. And with my anxiety I was being the antithesis ! I had to be reminded that every word in the script, and the concept of stringing together the tenets of the Bhakti Philosophy, had come from my heart, had been conceptualised and put together by me, had been performed many times ( though not in my city in recent times) Which meant that I had no real reason to be so anxious. Even at the venue, there were three shows happening simultaneously and much as anybody tried the noise spill-over sustained. So as I moved into a mellow 'Ye Teeruga Nanu' , Telugu song with the soft strum of the Ek Tara , there was raucous laughter and applause from the adjacent event. I was disturbed, lost my inertia and was trying not to show it . I was observing the audience to see if they were distracted/disturbed or still with the Bhakti Stories. I had a choice to stop and request to sort it out, but I knew it wouldn't help the situation. The other two venues being secluded from each other and from the stage and were less affected by the proximity and were also lost in their momentum. But then again....I thought when we are talking of Faith and Bhakti in the midst of the 'Bhava Saagaram'...This is fantastic test to sustain focus and attention in the midst of the din :) And so the show went on and concluded on a note of satisfaction more than I had ever imagined. For me the active particpation and thought-provoking responses from the audience, infused enthusiasm and energy and somewhere in the excited exchnage of 'Kabir Dohas' and their meaning, somewhere as we clapped along to the beats of 'Panduranga Vithala' ....I forgot there were other events. We were present with 'Bhakti Poets' storytelling-listening-discussing and all else eventually drowned. I am always thankful to the auidence for making the storytelling a success because with 'Storytelling', the performance is a co-created performance. The storyteller takes the lead but the audience has to trust and join in this journey on the wings of words. For a theme like Bhakti Poets, finding the adults and the children bringing their focus both consciously and otherwise to the event, and staying together was a beautiful reminder; a repeated learning of the power of listening, and the power of the listener. Thank you dear audience. And once again an event of Story Arts took shape thanks to the love and generous efforts of Gayatri Ingle and Sammy Sahni. And on the final day support also came from Mohit Garg, and my elder son Harshvardhan (who chose to come as he waas felling better) and my younger one Yajat , for the audi-video recording. It was one more day to be grateful. And this morning, I lost my cool over some issue was furious and suddenly flashes of last evening .returned. Another reminder to step back and watch the Self. Of course every emotion has its 'space and need' for expression. However I am beginning to get a sense that it is part of the journey is to understand the root of the responses within the self, as much to understand the external factors that disturb.

** Jan27th, Performing on Bhakti Poets at Nritya - Forum for Performing Arts, Hyderabad.